Wow …2019! What can I say? It’s already August and I feel like theres been a lot of loss in my personal life so far this year.
I have been away from the blog for a little while. I had to take time to mourn, grieve and in other circumstances reassess.
People always say that “everything happens for a reason” and “God makes no mistakes”. I know it may seem blasphemous to some, but I really found it tough to take at the time.
I had to question for WHAT reason are these things happening.
What is this teaching me?
Why must I continually feel such pain?
… I dont understand
If you know me personally, then you may know that I lost my nan this year. And it hit me a lot harder than I expected.
I know that death is a fact of life and bereavement was something which I would have to deal with eventually.
One of the things her passing caused me to question was – How can somebody who seems so good, spends their time in the church, get baptised, and down the bingo then get cancer which takes them away from all of us.
It’s a situation I’m still really struggling to fathom!
Sometimes, it really is just about appreciating what you have, because you never know how long you have.
It has been hard this year but I thought I would share some tips on dealing with grief:
Accept that people deal differently to loss – It wasn’t just me grieving it was also my family members and I had to be respectful and appreciate that me and my family were going to deal with this in different ways.
Talking – I found that at first I was bottling things up and wouldnt really talk about it but when I foudt hat I was able to open up and express myself I felt a great sense of relief and it was just useful to be able to discuss how I am feeling.
Routine – For me peronally I only took a couple of days of work as I felt I needed to keep up with my usual routine. Without having a constant and lots of free time it gave me the opportunity to wallow and it can be hard to pull yourself out of it.
Sleep – Try and get a good amount of sleep. Sleep deprivation will always make us feel ten times worse no matter what we are dealing with.
Don’t numb the pain in unhealthy ways – Going to the gym really helped me to de-stress, clear my mind and release some endorphins. I don’t think that numbing the painn with drugs and alochol and going out partying is the way forward.
There are services available which you may find really helpful. I recomend both NHS and Mind Charity.
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